Thrive wherever life takes you #7
One truth I’m sharing: How running contributes to my mental health as told by a psychologist.
No running isn’t therapy, but it improves my life every day.
I was recently interviewed for an article that set out to address the popular hashtag, #runningismytherapy. I spoke with the author, Ashley Mateo, about the things running has in common with therapy, and also about important differences between the two. Speaking with her about the intersection of two of my favorite topics, running and mental health, was delightful and I feel like we could have chatted for hours.
Running is undoubtedly not therapy. The magic of therapy happens because there is someone else there (an expert) who points out how your patterns of thinking, feeling, or acting might be unhelpful and keep you stuck. Therapy is powerful because we often can’t do this work alone in the vacuum of our own heads. If you knew what your limiting patterns of thinking and behaving were, and how to change them, you wouldn’t have them.
While running is not my therapy then, it has undoubtedly had a tremendous impact on my mental health. Here’s why.
Running represents one thing I do each day for myself.
As a mental health provider, I quite literally take care of other people all day. My job is to make space for other’s emotions, needs, and difficult moments. My career leaves me feeling satisfied and full, but it’s not a turn off your brain and be mindless kind of job. I also have two dogs (who cannot take care of themselves despite trying their best and being good boys) and a wonderful partner (who works too hard to take care of any of the non-work work in our home). Between my professional life and personal obligations, I often feel that the bulk of my day is spent attending to the needs of others. In the midst of all this caretaking, I believe it is incredibly valuable to my mental health to have one thing I do each day that is just for me. In fact, I believe it is a necessity. Making time each day to go for a run feels like a gift I give to myself. It refills me and allows me to keep giving to others. When I carve out time to do something for myself, it makes me a better psychologist, better partner, and better person. I encourage you to ask yourself what is the one thing you do just for yourself each day.
Running has positively transformed the way I think and feel about my body.
In a world in which too many women base their self-worth on the size of their jeans and the prevalence of disordered eating is nearly 1 in 3, endurance running truly allows me to shift the focus from what my body looks like to what it can do. Running has helped me re-write my relationship with my body. If I want my body to keep showing up for me and allowing me to do amazing things I need to treat it with love and respect. I need to fuel it and rest it. When I am in the middle of a race, or even just a regular training run, the way that my body looks becomes completely unimportant (which is good news for me if you’ve ever seen any of my race pictures). There were points in my life when being mid run was just about the only time I wasn’t critiquing my body. In these years running offered an amazing reprieve from a negative inner critic that was hard to quiet. Over time, those glimpses of mid-run insight extended beyond just the running time, and have allowed me to believe and adopt this attitude toward my body most of the time. Running has allowed me to make peace with my body and feel like it is working for me, not against me.
Running allows me to process thoughts, emotions, decisions, and situations in a manner I am just not able to tap into in my daily life.
People love to ask me what I think about when I run. If you are a runner, I’m sure you’ve gotten this question before. I usually joke and say something like “everything and nothing at the same time”. While these words don’t quite capture it, they come close. Sometimes running allows me to turn off my brain and to not think about a situation or a problem I’ve been otherwise unable to not think about. In this sense, it serves as a temporary way to quiet a stressed or anxious mind. Sometimes when I’m running I am able to push back on or challenge negative, stressful, anxious, or otherwise unhelpful patterns of thought as well. If I’m trying to process something difficult or make a big decision, running seems to help me flush out thoughts that I am not able to access in non-running time. I can distinctly remember several “ordinary” 45 minute training runs that ended up being life changing because of the conclusions that I came to on them and the moments of insight I experienced.
Running helps me realize I am a better, and stronger person, than I otherwise feel I am.
Quite simply, when I run I feel that I embody the qualities I most want to have and I become a person I am proud to be. I admire individuals who are full of grit, tenacity, and resilience. I admire individuals who aren’t intimidated by a challenge, who are willing to take a risk to reap a reward, and who lean into discomfort in order to achieve something of great personal significance. I admire individuals who pursue dreams and live fully, those who say yes to the things that bring them joy and are rich in experiences. The person I just described has definitely not always been me. There have been times I’ve taken the easy path, said no to something I was too scared to try, and let fear make my decisions for me. But when I am running, I believe I tap into all these qualities. Running allows me to see myself differently, to realize I am capable of the bravery, strength, spirit, gusto, and perseverance I so admire in other people.
One quote I’m loving right now:
“You are only one decision from a totally different life.”– Wilfred A. Peterson
Did this post resonate with you? Drop me a comment. I would love to hear how running, or your sport of choice, impacts your mental health. Are you an athlete interested in individualized support related to mental performance coaching, balancing sport and life, or overcoming disordered eating and body image difficulties? Please reach out, I am accepting new clients and would love to work with you.